Colorism | Corpus Christi | Chit Chat

Hey!

So this is Jante and I guess this is more of talky/opinion post on whatever I want today. Right now, I want to discuss colorism/natural hair/personal beliefs etc, while in between I feature pictures from my time in Corpus Christi.

And look, I already know that I’m going to get a lot of hate if I were to talk about feminism or racism because it is such a polarizing topic so colorism seems like the next best place to start. 

Colorism(n.): Prejudice or discrimination against individuals with a dark skin tone, typically among people of the same ethnic or racial group.

(Courtesy of Oxford Dictionary)

To be frank, from a very young age I always thought that light was beautiful and straight hair was beautiful and light colored eyes were beautiful. European features were ideal and I began to despise my African features including my curly hair, dark eyes, and wide nose. My brother Jameel got the long Arab nose, the sunken deep eye sockets, everything that made him look less "black" while I got all the uglier features.

Me and my sister at Pier 99

I failed to see my beauty and put that alongside me being an overweight child, with limited social skills (that I am still working on till this day), it made for an unhappy childhood and rough growth during my formative years of middle school and early high school.

I’ve realized that “natural” hair in the black community is coming back and I am very happy that many women are embracing and loving the hair that comes out of their head like yes, this is definitely progress. But I really hate that we hold ourselves back because we still want to put the European standards of beauty on the hair that grows out of our scalp.

Left to Right: Babbie (step-dad), brother, and brother

We are mainly going to be talking about colorism in the natural hair community for now. Colorism in everyday life and in the black community is just such a broad topic and I can do a series on it, I don’t know, we will see.

First, let’s say you go to YouTube to find a "natural" curly hair routine. Most of the time you would find curly hair routines on girls with curl types that range from 2c to maybe 4a. You want to learn more about curl patterns? Go here.

But no one wants to watch a video with some lady with “kinky” hair where there isn’t a definite curl pattern. Why? It’s not considered pretty. Basically, the rule of thumb to be a popular natural hair guru on YouTube is that people are going to watch your videos if you can lay your baby hairs down. If you can’t, you’re not going to make it as a huge YouTuber or natural hair care blogger in general.

Brother

My hair has a long story but I didn’t have a relaxer in my hair until I was 14 and it was mainly because I had no idea how to take care of my hair. I hated combing it out and just putting it in a ponytail and I yearned to have the ability to wear my hair down like the rest of my friends….even if I had a hijab on. (Whatever that’s a different story)

I did it and I really liked it for the next couple of weeks until I got tired of it and saw how lifeless it was. No movement, no body. It was dead and thin and it wasn't me but instead, I was faking it and in the end, I grew resentful of it and hated it. So for two years I grew it out and slowly trimmed it every month or so until all the relax hair was gone.

I was dibbledabblying with straighteners and experimenting with short hair cuts until when I was 19, I straightened my hair in Dubai and whatever happened it completely denatured my head of hair leaving only two inches of my hair from the root curly and the rest of my head pin straight. It left my hair damaged, just like it was when I relaxed my hair five years ago. In August of 2015, I cut my hair into basically a long afro that barely reached chin length when stretched out.

Anyways it’s been a little over a year and it now reaches past my collarbones. I’m happy with it now, it’s curly, it’s healthy and I am extremely satisfied with it.

Now my hair is what I would consider to be 3c to 4a curl pattern so I’m cutting it close but because I can lay my baby hairs down, I have “pretty hair.” And now add the fact that I am mixed with other things other than black and now I have this unwanted label added onto me like I’m some rare commodity.

It’s weird and honestly, when we talk about natural hair we need to stop labeling hair as “good hair” and “kinky hair”. No. ALL hair is good hair no matter how coarse, short, long or WHATEVER it is. It doesn’t need to have defined ringlets or curls for it to be beautiful. It can have no curls, no waves, just be as coiled and zigzag as it can be and just be as beautiful.

Anyways I think that’s all I have to say for now. Thanks for reading.

Mom

Sincerely,

Jante  

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Muse Of the Moment: "Black Boyfriend" by Dave Harris

Hey! 

So I guess I'm going to do a new segment here and simply discuss music, artwork, poetry, books , photography, or simply things I like. I've been watching Button Poetry on YouTube for a couple of years now and I've gathered a bunch of spoken poetry I really love. From Fatima Asghar to Ollie Schminkey to Aziza Barnes to Patrick Roche I have taken an interest into spoken word. Some have made me cry, others have made me laugh and others have made me take a seat and think.

"Black Boyfriend" by Dave Harris gives a thought provoking take on what it means to be a black man in the world of interracial dating. It's interesting, funny and at the end of the poem it brings up a poignant statement. Honestly, I really feel like it would do the poem injustice if you don't watch the video. These words on the computer screen do not carry the same rhythm, pace, and emotion as how the poet would want it to be delivered so please watch it the link will be here.

Watch it, than come back. Please :)

For now I will post the poem here and discuss it. Pretty much it. (I transcribed it so obviously there might be some rhythm or spacing issues but I tried to make sure it was as accurate as possible.)

To the fathers of too many women I’ve dated

The day I meet you, I always straighten my tie.

I use the biggest words I know

I break out the good shoes.

So you can see them, before you can see past them

I always go in for the handshake.

See I’ve been practicing my good, strong, grip. I go in for the shake, look you in the eye like the man I always see it that

Surprised face.

That face that says

“Oh”

Says

“Oh shit.”

Says

“Oh shit, my daughter did not bring home a black guy –“

Yup!

That’s me! I’m your daughter’s first black boyfriend. Surprise!

I bet, I bet you didn’t see that one coming.

Yes indeed, you daughter is in fact “down with the brown”

I’m sorry. I guess this means you must have failed as a parent.

Or maybe it’s just a phase, let’s hope it’s just a phase.

Still

I know you tried to nip this in the bud, when you were young.

See you caught her watching Tyler Perry one time and you slapped her across the mouth!

She said, “But Dad, I was only flipping through the channels.”

To which you replied, “Becky, you better take yo ass in yo room and watch an episode of Full House, starring Bob Saget. BOB SAGET!”

Yet still,

Those thirty seconds of "Madea’s Family Reunion" must have burned a hole into her heart cause now,

I’m here

You’re worst nightmare.

You know how it goes,

“Once you go black, you never go back.”

Say it with me y’all

“ONCE YOU GO BLACK, YOU NEVER GO BACK.”

And it’s permanent.

That’s right.

It’s real

It’s real like she gonna look at Ryan Gosling and think “I wish he was darker yo, I wish he was darker!”

It’s real

It’s real like you can Google that shit on WebMD

It’s real

It’s real like if my penis was in Congress, they’d call it the majority whip

And speaking of Congress

Did you know that the first American log of interracial marriage was made in 1691?

Interracial marriage was not made legal in the United States until 1967, America

Is often lauded as being the great melting pot

For the way it brings together different races, different cultures, different differences

Do not, call this country a melting pot when nothing has melted

Do not, call this country a melting pot, forget how long it was illegal to mix.

You might never live a day in the life of this skin and I won’t ever yours

but shared experiences has value regardless

One girl taught me how to swing dance, I taught her how to dougie.

One girl taught me about Seoul food from Korea, I taught her about soul food from my kitchen.

So to all the fathers

Like you.

This

Is simply what it looks like when your children do better than you did.

Wake up.

If I am your worst nightmare you need to figure out what the fuck is wrong with your dreams.

As soon as I heard that last statement I understood that this was going to be a favorite. He won me over with the performance, the distinctive pauses in between verses and just the passion that he exuded during this entire poem. And now I have something new to appreciate since working on this blog post. I haven't noticed or appreciated a spoken poet's writing abilities until transcribing this poem. So much of it sounds like regular talking that I lost some of the purposeful emphasis and repetition that Mr. Harris put a lot of work into and is consistently show through the poem. The play on words is also a really cool feature with "Seoul" food and "soul" food. It had humor with pop culture references such as Full House and I was laughing so hard when he said Bob Saget with so much conviction. Like yes. I needed this angry man to yell at me those two words: Bob Saget! 

It's an entertaining poem, I want more from Dave Harris honestly. Maybe I can find some! Until than, I hope you liked this post and I will see you soon. 

- Jante 

i n s t a g r a m | _abatty_